Lao Wie
Most of the time I embrace as much of it as I can find a way to. When they stare I say “Ni hao” and hope to work on my mandarin a little. Sometimes they feel uncomfortable and look or walk away. I can’t help but smile at strangers even if they are staring at me. I got a fortune cookie from Tikiport once that said “a smile is a curve that can get a lot of things straight.” Half the time when someone smiles at you, you cant help but smile back. It isn’t something that you see a lot of people doing too often anymore, which is really a shame. Having said that, I have noticed more people smile back home then anywhere else I have been so far, which really surprised me. It seemed like so many people back home where miserable, I guess in comparison they really aren’t.
In the past few days, I haven’t been smiling as much or as accepting of people staring. If a week ago you asked me how I felt about being here I would have told you that the only dislike I have about Fuzhou is not being able to see the stars. But our paradigms of places are forever shifting with the experiences that happen while we are in them.
Racist acts and what we refer to as “hate crimes” back in the states, occur all over the world every day. Not every racist act is a hate crime. Racist acts aren’t all together new to me. From being told I would need to move tables in the cafeteria in my high school, to having a women point to my skin and say “no sale”, I have experienced a variety over time. Hate crimes are different. They are most often violent and instill fear.
Within the past month a Chinese women in Beijing was allegedly raped by a foreigner from the UK. There is a recording going around of it on the internet. Its pretty graphic, and ends with the foreigner, or “lao wei” as we are referred to here in China as, getting badly beaten up by several men. Because of the incident, the people in china are pretty upset with the foreign population at the moment. If you can manage to find the video on a Chinese website such as http://www.youku.com/ you can read some of the comments and opinions of what the Chinese people think about what happened and foreigners in their homeland. Most likely they are just the opinions of the people who are very upset, but they aren’t good.
A few nights ago it was one of the teachers going away party. We all had a great night together and we attempted to end it with a group of us eating street food in an area we frequent a few times a week. I was with a manager and other staff that has lived here for years and it didn’t occurred to me that I was somewhere dangerous. Fights had happened there before, but what bar hasn’t had a fight in it? None had ever involved any of us or any other foreigners that we knew of and the staff where we got food from was always friendly to us.
As we were saying our goodbyes, check paid, a presumably drunk, Chinese man started screaming at us. His friends tried to quiet him and apologized. My Chinese language skills are a work in progress, and I still don’t know what he was saying. We had done nothing to upset him and didn’t say a word or respond to his apparent fit of rage at the sight of us. We got up and left.
They followed us outside. We started walking down the street towards where the cabs were. The next thing I knew I was on the ground. The angry Chinese man had came up beside me and sucker punched me in the face. I was with almost all men. The Chinese man had wanted a fight and now he was going to get one. What kind of a guy sucker punches a 100lb girl in the face? When I got up punches were already being thrown. As I looked around I saw the street coming alive with people coming out of the woodwork.
When you’re in a foreign country it doesn’t matter what started the fight, if you are a foreigner you are the enemy and the locals will not be taking your side. That’s just how it works. I had seen similar a situation in Cambodia that almost resulted in someone dying before my eyes and no one caring enough to even call an ambulance. The value of a human life is different in places like this and moral codes such as not hitting a woman in the face don’t necessarily apply here. It was suicidal to stick around, so I asked my friends to come with me, and then left hoping they would follow me. They didn’t and most ended up in the hospital.
I am okay and my friends either are or are going to be. That’s the most important thing. No matter how many times I replay what happen in my head or how I could have done things differently it doesn’t really matter, this situation is well on its way to being behind me. I do feel slightly responsible no matter how many times people have told me not to because my friends got hurt trying to defend me. I almost wish I had been on my own when it happened so I could have taken the punch, picked myself up and walked away without further issues. But the man’s fight was never with me.
I believe that what happened was in direct result to the media around the alleged rape of the local women in Beijing. Videos like the one on the internet help to form stereo types of foreigners being the enemy. I can’t speak for every foreigner in China but I came here to teach English, learn the language and immerse myself in a culture completely different then my own, not to hurt anyone.
Fuzhou is a safe city. I know its hard to believe that given the story that I just told, but it is. My boss has been here 9 years and says he has never encountered an incident like this until now. Worse things have happened where I’m from on Cape Cod to women of my age and race. Bad stuff happens everywhere. You roll the dice every time you walk out the door anywhere you are, this is no exception, and I refuse to hide scared under a rock so that nothing bad ever happens to me. I do however recognize that I am not indestructible, and needless to say I will not be returning to that area at that time of night.
The incident has for the time being, distorted how I see the people here when I am face to face with them. I wonder what they think of me as they stare. What my students think about foreigners and if they will grow up disliking me and what I represent. More then ever I know this will never be home. I have had my moments of wanting to pack up and take off, knowing its something I am good at and have down to a 10 minute routine. But I signed a one-year contract and will be honoring it.
I grew up thinking that things like racism and hate crimes were wrong, but concepts are different everywhere you go and that angry Chinese man was obviously raised differently then me. What’s important to remember is that this is just one day out of that year. I’ve had so many amazing experiences so far and I’m sure there will be more to come. I am looking forward to sharing them with who ever wish to read them. Things aren’t the same as what we are partial to back home and this experience makes that very clear, which is why I figured I would start with it. I’m 12 time zones away on the other side of the world, as far away from home as is possible without leaving the planet and things aren’t suppose to be the same. Welcome to China.
